Sunday, December 28, 2008

San Diego Going Big

From the ashes of the recall have emerged some genuine drinkers. I am paired up with one right now with the pending callsign "Chaparro", and his local boys to hit the scene later tonight. no plan, aside from getting fucked up and going crazy here. results to follow.

Saturday, December 20, 2008

One of the best times I have had in a while.

I have been meaning to blog about my trip up to philedelphia. One of the best times of my life, and completely detrimental to my liver.

The first relaxing night, we decorated Wooly's Christmas tree. We went to Joe Canal's liquor store to buy the decorations... For those of you who have never been to the promise land, consider a pilgrimage to this beautiful store. Wall to Wall, aisle after aisle of wines, liquors and beers. Beers i have never even heard of but wish one day i can introduce them to my stomach. But i digress, we bought a cornucopia of delicious beers in the can. After the beers were finished we hung it up with care.

The next night was a strip club night, see below post with the midget.

Friday night was the standout of the trip. Mudvayne in concert, is more insane than you can even imagine. The lead singer came out covered in blood and a red chicken suit, and never stopped rocking. A few notable events:

Cougar Stomping- A cougar tried to get with Blaze at the concert, then she wanted out of the pit and tried to crowd surf out...Which would have worked, but she got scared halfway through and fell down and pulled blaze down with her, while i helped Blaze up, Wooly proceeded to stomp the cougar.

Emo Shot put- Perfected by Wooly, it is when annoying emo kids are around, and you want them gone, just throw them on top of the crowd...(note- they dont' even have to consent, just throw the weird little fuckers)

NIGHTOWLS, IF GIVEN THE CHANCE, GO SEE MUDVAYNE.. DONATE BLOOD, SELL A KIDNEY DO WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO DO TO SEE THIS MANIACS LIVE.

The weekend was more debauchery, but next i will talk about the Eagles game.

Once again Wooly I thank the hell out of you for this. I have never understood what Will was talking about Phildelphia fans are the most relentless fans ever. I do now, these people boo everything, opponents, their own team, and definetly the opposing fans. I will say i took part in the festivities and the harrassing of browns fans. Was the best week i have had since the first Busch gardens trip.

Once i develop my disposable camera i will put up some pictures.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

NEVER MOVE TO CLEVELAND

http://blog.cleveland.com/metro/2008/12/boy_killed_mom_and_shot_dad_ov.html

FEZ!

Friday, December 12, 2008

Untapped Talent....


The last time in Philly, i went to a nice strip bar.... What i went to this time was even more ridiculous, and not in a good way. This place took notes stragight from Olivia herself.... Above is the stripper blaze was talking to.

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

I DONT KNOW WHAT TO SAY ABOUT THIS

HAYLO


So this is my new haven to post interesting pics of things i find terribly fascinating on the interweb. And you will all be happy to know i have the second most boring job on the planet behind the guy that catalogs books. ENJOY!

Anyone else HUNGRY!

Picture of Fez on his drive to philly.


FOUND YOU TOO, FAGGOT!

Purnell, get of tha internetz now!


Found ya bitch!

Friday, December 5, 2008

Semper wtf

Think about the worst possible place you ever had to live while in the military. When youre done, picture it 30 years older with no maintenance. thats Camp Talega.

However, this is not all bad. Given that this place used to house grunts when they were training here, and they were allowed to drink, and we still at least have access to an APS here, I'm getting the feeling that this place is some sort of ancient historical holy land of going big. The k-spans have beer stains on the beer stains all over the floors.

Set out in the middle of bumfuck pendleton, Talega is a wasteland with access to alcohol, but not water. thats right, if you want water, buy it or live without. or drink from the shower. Talega is now a training ground for the chosen damned who were rejected the chance of free will, even though we all did sign the damn contract. However, going big is possible here. If there werent so many mouthy fucks in possesion of their own alcohol, it would be a hell of a lot easier to rally the local masses and have somewhat of a good time.

Sunday, November 30, 2008

Seattle

The Central and Fuel are places that Going Big is allowable and just awesome places to go drink in Seattle.

I will say i did see some of the problems that Kaiser was talking about, like someone using a laptop at a Bar after 10 on a Friday night. WTF!!

Other than that i got cockblocked by some chicks mom for not wanting to bang her(the mom). Damn my cougar magnetism, never did I think it would cockblock me.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Seattle: the scip-scap capital

Scipscapital? yeah, that.

This is no place for Nightowls. not in the slightest. there is no partying amongst the general populace. You cannot go out to a place here and make an impression by doing what we do. For example, Mako's in Orlando. The 2nd night we went there we were given free VIP passes because of what transpired the previous night. Here? Good luck getting someone to accept a drink YOU bought them because all they want to do is sip the one drink they will have that night and blog on their laptop about fucking global warming, while the touchpad jukebox plays Dido in a community polite decibel level.

Yes i realize this is technically a blog but not really, its just way cheaper than a website. and by cheaper i mean free.

So fuck seattle. it'd be a god damned waste of time....so, any trips planned to a real place? I make fun of the south a lot, but I'll give them one thing, they know how to go big. I would be grateful if someone could suggest a good spot down there somewhere to make a trip to once im done with whatever the hell they'll be making me do before i get sent back to the meatgrinder.

Miami? party with the cubanos?
New Orleans at mardi gras?
Charleston? always wanted to go there.
Philly, same thing.

Lets hear some ideas.

Monday, November 17, 2008

GTFO



Mike Holmgren, if you dont want to end up like Mussolini, hung by your neck from a lightpost with piano wire, I suggest you go the fuck home this week. Go coach high school football or something. So much for your plan to pull out all the stops in your last year, apparently that means running between the tackles on 3rd and long, when your team is down by 12.

Blaming everything on the refs was cute in 2005, and some of it was deserved, but dont assume every single blunder made by the seahawks comes as a result of a yellow rag not being thrown. Josh Wilson might be the worst cornerback in the history of the NFL, and youre the one letting him stay out there to get assfucked by every receiver who lines up across from him.

Yeah there has been a disgusting amount of injuries to the team, but most of them have been reconciled by now. Injuries arent hurting the team anywhere near as much as the retarded ass plays Holmgren calls at the most critical moments. You have the offensive playcalling talent of a lobotimized offspring of a village idiot and TV weather girl. How anyone concluded that he was a genius in the field would baffle the people who created the hadron collider.

The running game is nonexistant once again, but certainly not for lack of talent. when you fail to use the pieces you have, you cant blame them. Maurice Morris has proven to be a poor man's Brian Westbrook, he just needs to have some plays drawn up specifically for him. TJ Duckett is a god damned monster, yet is only used when they need 1 or 2 yards. Julius Jones, the man who IS getting the ball, was signed to replace Shaun Alexander, since Shaun liked to skip to the line, bust a move, then fall down. Jones' style is completely different, as he runs full speed at the line, smashes into it, then falls down. It doesnt take Lara Croft, Sherlock Holmes and Angela Lansbury to discover the mystery of this wretched fucking offense.

Just go away, you might end up with a dozen or so less heart attacks.

Monday, November 10, 2008

It's good to be back.

Well, we hit Savannah withun a full force and didn't even dent the top.

A few notable moments,

Real estate rain, community turkey leg, the unsuccessful sign grab, pillow battle to the death, the lost designated driver, keg purse, river street rumble and of course the taxi door.

fez

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Disorders

you are full of shit. whatever that "disease" is that you think you have, youre full of shit. stop using bi-polar or OCD or whatever the hell as an excuse for your fuck ups. just admit you made a stupid mistake and have a fucking laugh about it. nobody will care.

you are not crazy. if you were crazy, you wouldnt have to tell everyone around you that you are for them to realize it. accept your goddamn personality and live with it. stop telling people youre insane, because you are not. insane people dont know theyre insane. stupid people use it as an excuse for doing the stupid things they do.

you do not need that fucking pill you saw on TV for that disorder you saw on TV to get the desired results you saw on TV. chill the fuck out and stop taking things so seriously, stop creating fucking stupid drama for no other reason than to draw attention to yourself. you want attention? do something commendable. Its much better than just having people feel sorry for you because they think youre a fucking retard.

Monday, October 27, 2008

I LIKE MONKEYS!

I LIKE MONKEYS
I like monkeys.

The pet store was selling them for five cents a piece. I thought that
odd since they were normally a couple thousand each. I decided not to
look a gift horse in the mouth. I bought 200. I like monkeys.

I took my 200 monkeys home. I have a big car. I let one drive. His
name was Sigmund. He was retarded. In fact, none of them were really
bright. They kept punching themselves in their genitals. I laughed.
Then they punched my genitals. I stopped laughing.

I herded them into my room. They didn't adapt very well to their new
environment. They would screech, hurl themselves off of the couch at
high speeds and slam into the wall. Although humorous at first, the
spectacle lost its novelty halfway into its third hour.

Two hours later I found out why all the monkeys were so inexpensive:
they all died. No apparent reason. They all just sorta' dropped dead.
Kinda' like when you buy a goldfish and it dies five hours later. Damn
cheap monkeys.

I didn't know what to do. There were 200 dead monkeys lying all over my
room, on the bed, in the dresser, hanging from my bookcase. It looked
like I had 200 throw rugs.

I tried to flush one down the toilet. It didn't work. It got stuck.
Then I had one dead, wet monkey and 199 dead, dry monkeys.

I tried pretending that they were just stuffed animals. That worked for
a while, that is until they began to decompose. It started to smell real
bad.

I had to pee but there was a dead monkey in the toilet and I didn't want
to call the plumber. I was embarrassed.

I tried to slow down the decomposition by freezing them. Unfortunately
there was only enough room for two monkeys at a time so I had to change
them every 30 seconds. I also had to eat all the food in the freezer so
it didn't all go bad.

I tried burning them. Little did I know my bed was flammable. I had to
extinguish the fire.

Then I had one dead, wet monkey in my toilet, two dead, frozen monkeys in
my freezer, and 197 dead, charred monkeys in a pile on my bed. The odor
wasn't improving.

I became agitated at my inability to dispose of my monkeys and to use the
bathroom. I severely beat one of my monkeys. I felt better.

I tried throwing them way but the garbage man said that the city wasn't
allowed to dispose of charred primates. I told him that I had a wet
one. He couldn't take that one either. I didn't bother asking about the
frozen ones.

I finally arrived at a solution. I gave them out as Christmas gifts. My
friends didn't know quite what to say. They pretended that they like
them but I could tell they were lying. Ingrates. So I punched them in
the genitals.

I like monkeys

Friday, October 24, 2008

Welcome back, shitbag

Hi, now that the window of opportunity is closing in fast, and I'll soon be confined to the dog kennel that is the marines, I'm going to take a moment to be selfish.

Let me start by saying, FUCK YOU marine corps. Thats right, i hate your guts. All your tradition you value so much, but cast aside if the slightest thing doesnt go your way, shove all that right up your ass. Its a shame that in what is supposed to be a no nonsense badass collection of tough motherfuckers, There is a hierarchy that is fed from total bullshit. Liars and ass kissers are rewarded, while the non questioning, hard working people, the REAL few and proud, are ignored because they havent got anything to bitch and moan about. they dont try to get out of working parties, they dont turn into a pathetic crybaby when someone else gets promoted, they are merely happy for that person.

So, heres the fun part. When I left, i dragged a trail of guilt behind me based on the feeling that I had let my unit down. By abandoning them in a time of war, when they needed instructors, I split because i was a gnats wing away from insanity from deploying. Well you know what? Kiss my fucking ass now. I dont feel that way anymore. People were pissed because i took so long to decide what i was going to do, I didnt like it anymore than they did, but fuck it now.

Know why? Because there were people 2 years away from their EAS that repeated the phrase "fuck this i'm leaving" all the time. Those people got a plaque, a prop with everyones signatures, and everyone stayed late after work for their ceremonies. On the other hand, I, who didnt even want to leave the unit, wanted to stay and train the new guys, and carry on the Night Owl colors, and only didnt because i knew i would go fucking batshit without a break, got nothing.

No prop, no signatures. What I got was yelled at from top Trani to get the fuck out of the office. So sorry i didnt stop caring halfway through my enlistment top. I'll be back in a VMU unit soon, but know this, the friends I've made at Cherry Point are the only things keeping me from telling the commandant to go fuck himself with my rolled up recall orders.

Thursday, October 9, 2008

Demon dog


Yes this is correct I would like my dog to become a prospect. After a Friday night of hanging out with his bitch. He not only drank warm beer but ate grass soaked in beer foam.

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

TICE PICTURES



An oldie but a goodie

Monday, September 29, 2008

Scip Scappery within the ministry.

Well folks,

The Scip Scappery is because of the lack of communications.

Kaiser WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!!!!!!!!

I haven't got a straight answer as to what is happening with you, whether you coming in not coming in, where you getting sent. Just give your brothers some info.

P, what the fuck!!!(smaller letters, because you haven't kept us in the dark as long)

How was the wedding? Any go big moments, how is life back home! No excuse for you, you are back home and can make a blog in the matter of minutes.


Everyone knows what's up with me, in iraq-then NC- Then a philly trip- then AZ. That's it.

Just tired of getting the run around and half answers.

Friday, September 26, 2008

Ronald Jenkees Shit

Here is a dude, Ronald Jenkees, he makes some sick beats and songs with just a keyboard and some mixing software. Check this shit:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0O2aH4XLbto

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=maxWVCW-Lqs&feature=user

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WEcckX1kHWI&feature=user

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lg8LfoyDFUM&feature=user

Response

Some funny ass shit. This my bro Eli

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Football for Beer

3 games into the season. weve seen what teams are fucked up and which ones are in good shape. key players are injured, newcomers are kicking ass, its time for picks.

categories are:
1. Team that sucked ass last year that will make the playoffs
2. Playoff team last year that will suck ass
3. Coach that will be fired
These are worth 1 point each.

4. League MVP
5. Super bowl champs
These are worth 2 points each.
Whoever has the most points at the end wins free drinks for one night of their choosing, on Kaiser.

Mine are
1. Bills
2. Colts
3. Lane Kiffin
4. Jonathan Stewart
5. Broncos

Monday, September 22, 2008

A lot of stuff.

Kaiser,

Can we get all the Good Videos added to the Movies. Just so they don't get lost in the Archives. I think Acosta needs up there. That one is hilarious. Some of the other good ones. we can have votes yay or nay if they stay up there...because frankly the psyclowns one is just fucking weird.

In other news, hopefully the scarecrow stops harrassing now that the logo is gone. Yes i know, that what i say is not anonymous, i have told many a folk. And that this is watched. This is the true Nightowls page. I am proud of my 4 deployments and the rampant drinking and good times we have had.

I don't think that i am wrong because i like to drink and get drunk. Alcohol is a drug, and a fucking fantastic one. If i am wrong for drinking then budweiser is a pusher man.

Everyone who says they like to drink and not get drunk is fucking stupid. The first sip causes the effects, so my advice is Go Big...or fucking go home.

Well folks i am off to do my job, which this page has never affected.

Long live Gunnamatna, another true nightowl.

Friday, September 19, 2008

George Patton on Terrorism

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xyUX6wV1lBQ

This video makes me want to kick some hippie ass and vote republican.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Does anyone remeber Acosta?



What a fucking crack head

Monday, September 15, 2008

Monday, September 8, 2008

New Pics to be amused by fuckers.

Wow, that was fast. Photobucket is full of cunts.

WHAT THE FUCK

Nice fuckin start

The eagles kicked the fuck out of the rams, the broncos play tommorow, and the dolphins did not play badly, as if they might be a good team this year.
the seahawks on the other hand, sucked big fat walrus balls. they tackled like their arms were all amputated below the wrist, all starting recievers are injured, and i swear to god if i see their punter on the street, i'll choke him to death with a charleston chew.

thats right, i invoked eminem.

way to go chargers, you got beat by a team that could barely make it out of the locker room without turning the ball over. if Norv Turner is ever in a porno, he'll have to be on bottom, cause all he can do is fuck up.

Tom Brady's out for the season. expect a 1800% increase in patriots TV coverage from now on. every time matt cassel audibles successfully, gets sacked, throws a TD, or trips on a fucking banana peel, you'll know about it on some fox action break.

the ravens and bengals played. at least thats what was scheduled, nobody has heard the results yet, since there wasnt anybody watching that game.

This is supposed to be the texans year to emerge in the AFC south. yeah, way to get it going by being pulverized by the mediocre steelers. enjoy another year of futility.

some team from phoenix played a team from san francisco, allegedly. no official report on whether or not these teams actually exist.

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

new Youtube video

Well I know it has been a while since I posted anything but, not to many people have either. Well I would like to say that I found more proof that sailors are flaming fags. How you ask? Proof from the most acclaimed gay/pro Navy I love to suck sailor cock movie ever. http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=cfbjUmG8zGk

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Tauren are real now.


Apparently men in backward ass countries have been up to something. this picture was taken in Thailand, of a humanoid stillborne baby, that was born from a cow. i feel a little bad for the dude who had to knock the cow up, but grats to you, its a great sacrifice for science. Next time get one of these things to be born alive and pretty soon we'll have rampaging Bull men running the worlds opiate supplies.

the next project: nguyenfits.

Friday, July 25, 2008

Friday, July 11, 2008

4th of July

Went fucking big. about 14 hours logged in one night. drank my ass into oblivion, lost a shoe, made a 16 year old girl chug a beer (i didnt realize she'd just gotten out of rehab), and burned the fuck out of myself with fireworks.

Highlights were me rolling around in the yard and falling in the ditch, and some old bitch shitting her pants. shit blowing up of course, and a friends fiance turning into a complete fucking bitch. god damn i'm glad im not the one marrying that cunt.

Monday, July 7, 2008

Blaze's GO BIG Moments


Well for starters we can go with Raleigh. Went with P, Fez, and Mongo to Raleigh to eat at the coveted Cheesecake Factory. Which later evolved into a drink fest on a random dudes tab and VIP bottles on someone else as well. Later, after telling P and Fez that I would "be right out" I found that I wasn't leaving but instead was going to stumble into Raleigh and try to discover the hotel (who's name I had no clue). I Get my phone run over, steal a hot dog, get laid, and end up at the hotel, where Mongo has 2 chicks eating and feeding him cheesecake, one of those happened to be my piece. I offer my "stolen" hotdog as a substitute and get denied, where I then throw said dog at wall, call the girls bitches and whores and walk out shirtless to the elevator and run into P and fez. Woke up in the bathtub, threw up in an Arby's bathroom and along every 20 miles of the drive home. Oh, and cotton all over me and ladies thinking I was being beaten was priceless.
Next I will go with any and all Greenville trips. Most of which ended with me on frat row, pissing on doors and screaming for sluts to come out and play with my balls. Something that apparently was my favorite thing to do in that place. Also, the patented "you look like whores" quote and bar puking incident are tops for me in that place.
And finally, Mongo and I on a drive back to base from Jersey on a random weekend, I am tired as fuck. So instead of waking the fucker up, I just pull over, he wakes up, takes over and I jump in the passenger seat and fall asleep. I awake a few hours later to Mongo poking me saying "I'm going for it dude". I open my eyes and see the posts for a railroad crossing coming down and a rather speedy fucking train approaching on our right side (also known as my fucking side). We swerved right, dodge the one post, swerve left and dodge the other, all while the train is blowing his horn and was close enough to where I could spit on the bitch with minimal effort. Needless to say, I was up the whole time after that.



Side Note: (fuck you that dont know the story)

Oh, and also, 2005 Ball I believe. A little beach sex (girl one, same one who got my face smashed a few weeks later), and then a little mud swimming for some ducks to get a little bathroom sex, right after Mongo told me to my face and to her's that she was "and ugly whore". Still gotta get that dick wet, he is the ruler of all. Then, late night, Brain and I throwing bottles at moving cars from his balcony and Maj. D trying to make the entire hotel's elevator system shutdown.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Philly, youtube, and whassahappening

Went up and visited Mongo, along with fellow nightowl Tatanka. We started the Journey with getting hammered and making Blaze pissed by destroying him in some Guitar Hero.

Second Night, was a "Dave and Busters Trip, but turned out to be 5 hours at a strip club". Memorable quote from club risque's oldest stripper was " Thank god you guys showed up, My pussy is soooo bored."

Third night involved me getting cut off by Mongo at a Japanese steakhouse. Granted it was warranted, i had been drinking heavy for 8 hours (including my old friend, the car bomb.) After that i don't remember much.

Fourth night was a celebrate life party. In which i did by spraying the young and old in the face with chlorine water. Making an old man do shots with me in beer mug necklaces and making a complete ass of myself.

Few cool people met along the way is, cripple tits, tina, tiny and rob.

Anyways. Youtube videos that need added.

-Nick swardson, smoke weed all day
-rack em willie
-count rackula
-brawndo and powerthirst videos.

fez

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Mongos go big moments

Let’s just start out with a classic. Halloween 2005. This night I got drunk belligerent, broke up with my girlfriend drank a 750 ml of Capt and showed up for the pistol range drunk in the morning.
AC 2006. This is when I spent 350 dollars in AC without gambling once… Yes it was all spent on booze. Then I was so drunk that I got robbed on my way home for the remaining 50 I had. I was so drunk I couldn’t even defend myself.
Greenville Not really sure when it was but hey. I got so drunk I threw up on the bar moved down a couple of seats and ordered more drinks and continued the madness.

Friday, June 20, 2008

P's Go Big Moments in History

Well, most of these I only remember because you guys told me.

1. The night i solidified my position in the ministry. Involved T-Bird, Wine, Beer, Maddog, and a massive assortment of other hard akahols. Did backflips in Mongo's room, he punched my legs numb. Ended with me being written on with shaving cream with an arrow pointing to my ass where a hotdog was strategically placed. I vomited what Kaiser described as a puppy fetus. OH, did i mentioned i was the first recipient of the now infamous BANANA SLAP.

2. Vin vs Cabo Wabo incident. consumed akahol for a period of 8-12hrs staright turned into a raging torture device. Threw an ironing board all over the room. repeatedly punched Krejnik in the balls. threatened everyones life. disappeared for 2hrs. ended that night with partcipating in a near beat down of Krejnik, helped takeover Makos of Orlando and slept in the bed with 4 other guys and one girl.

3. Myrtle Beach: don't know all the specifics..just know i was drunk enough to strip down to only my boxers in the middle of the day in january and run into the 4odegree atlantic ocean.

4.Murrells Inlet: drank a bottle of vinegar, drank cuban coffee and jaeger together, poured water all over Cuban, Jolly and guests.


i'm an idiot.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Honorable drunkens for Fez.

There have been many go big occasions for myself. But the outstanding ones are.

1. Vodka & No x-plode-combined with greenville trip. Ruining my chance at tang that night to grind on a 100lb chick, which i can only imagine it looking like a black lab on a chiuaua.

2. Drunk like Dice. Went home to Wyoming, talked like i was from New York, insulted everyone at the bar. Got free drinks, got angry, tried to run away and was overpowered by kaiser.

3.My brothers wedding. Open bar, and i became that guy. The crazy part was that they loved me. Gave my brother a toast, which I blacked out during, and rambled a bunch of nonsense and everyone loved it.

Can't really think of many others but i know they are there. Remind me of some if you can.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

The Drunkest Youve Ever Been

For me, I dont remember much about it. I doubt most of you remember a whole lot from your biggest of going big either, but lets give it a shot. Mine ended with me wearing a silk robe purchased in Qatar over my nightowls jersey, and pouring a beer over my head in the middle of mine and Fez's room. After said pouring, Fez ordered me to take a shower, which i did. with all my clothes on.

Honorable mentions:
1. the night Mongo had to hold me up as i took a piss
2. Screaming at the toilet
3. drinking a maddog, thunderbird and a handful of caffiene pills on the way to orlando

If anyone misses another honorable mention for themselves, add it to the comments on their post.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

WTF FEZ!!!

You give me shit for not being on here and being up on the latest events and yet there is NOTHING on here about you going to the schoolhouse...Prick. Wait until I see you in less than a month we will scrap.

From Det V (Vin) ministries latest Diary of OIF Vol 6.
ROBOtrippin: It's dumb and if you get caught doing it in Iraq you lose rank.

WTF CUBAN

Dude, i see you and Jolly log in on yahoo messenger all the time, but what happens when i try to talk to you? YOU LOG OFF. EVERY TIME. what the fuck man. youre always on for about 10 seconds, and no more. what the fuck eh? send a god damn message once in a while, i know youre getting mine ya bastards.

Target: Auburn

Auburn, WA. June 29th. its going to be a bloodbath of going big , destruction and mayhem. The conquest will happen, mark my words. A biker rally for some fuckin childrens sickness charity concert. Foghat, marshall tucker band and kenny wayne sheppard will all be in attendance to witness that which is Nightowl.

They will come to get their name on some money given to sick kids, they will leave knowing what it truly is to go big. I will be appointing my dad an honorary Nightowl for the event, under the callsign "Homer", to assist me in the devastation. various other Fulton clan members may be joining the carnage as well, and by the end of the melee, All of Auburn and its surrounding areas will know the name Gunnamatna.

Friday, June 13, 2008

BIT...CHES!

Guess what? KV isn't the shithole i thought it was. i can get on here at work?! I've been reading the post for the last 2 fuckin hrs. So i'm caught up now. Mongo i just might miss you due to VMU's unorganization. FUCK! Kaiser, mojave viper Fez tells me. You just got a toilet douche shoved up your ass. i hope to be out there this fall at 3 so... Alright, i gotta somehow make up all the points i had taken away for being deployed ( suck my balls FEZ) You ain't takin shit from me FOOL! Blaze you put some raunchy shit on here but that's what you do.lol. CUBA and JOLLY I coming over your house for my honeymoon. that will be all i can afford after this shit. FUCK driving I'm ridin my bike everywhere.

done rambling.

I hope someone hits Matt Ryan while their driving intoxicated ( sorry he's not worth what he being paid). Fuck Atlanta..Fuck the NY Giants .Fuck the cheatin ass Patriots

Holla Back

Kobe Bryant goes big

Not much to say except, Kobe knows what to do after a playoff loss. Some players might want to go practice more, but Kobe says fuck that. He knows its time to go big or go home, and what better way to start it of than with 20 or so shots. we'll see how that goes for him.

http://cosmos.bcst.yahoo.com/up/player/popup/?rn=207187&cl=8301194&ch=207399&src=sports

Friday, June 6, 2008

Since there is a lack of go big status being reported

I dock everyone 50dkp.

A few of you will get that, the rest will be dissapointed. Well fuckos, i got less than a month, i have to go home for a weekend. Have to work an airshow this weekend. So i have 2 weekends at my disposal. I need ideas, places to try to take down. I will solo if need be, but hopefully some RBE entourage joins in the war against the facist soberists.

G/b
Fez

Friday, May 23, 2008

Gunnamatna plugged on RS

About 15 minutes ago, Gunnamatna was mentioned on the friday night "RS Radio" show, by the DJ and music world insider Devanti. Thats right. A guy who used to hang with Joey Ramone gave us a holler on his Internet radio show. The URL for the show is linked on the right side of the site, and I'll be making requests every week in the name of the Nightowls ministry.

Thanks to Layla, a programmer / producer for RS radio for introducing me to Devanti, and letting us get involved over there, as we continue our go big dominance over the interwebs.
By the way, Fez is attempting to solo Atlantic City as I type this, so we'll find out how that goes sometime soon.

Also, I'd like to give a big "Fuck You" to Pussykat for being an insufferable rotten cunt in the name of Devanti.

Monday, May 19, 2008

Why Prolong it, Just Go!

Nothing else needs to be written...

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Love it for what is.

This is almost as good as Spoon shitting in the hamper.... I think it might be better because it is on the Intrawebnet. That's DOO DOO BABY.

Saturday, May 10, 2008

Wednesday, May 7, 2008

from the mexican't

A few videos to add to the site.

White chicks and gang signs. (very tasteful)

My new haircut.

Shoes. and then "muffins" from the same guy.

And if they don't get added. Chickity check check em skunts. All on you tube.

Sunday, May 4, 2008

Penguins vs. Flyers

If there was ever a time where you might watch hockey, its now. The eastern conference finals in this years Stanley Cup Playoffs features 2 teams that absolutely hate eachothe'rs guts, as well as their fans. Its going to be a motherfucking bloodbath on ice.

Baseball is fucking gay until the world series, Basketball is a goddamn freakshow, they have the tallest people in the world for fucks sake, and theyre all in it for the money. Football at least has a great team element to the sport, but players are becoming mercenaries and crimanals more and more. Hockey has very few primadonna pussies with huge salaries than any other sport, 99% of the league is in it to win it, and nothing else.

So heres your chance to see what the NHL playoffs are all about, and dont give me that shit about not knowing the rules, you can look anything up on the internet now in 30 seconds. And by the way, Fuck you to the flyers beforehand, you dirty little bitches.

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

If you think things are bad.


You could be this guy. Now his shit would suck.

Bitches, they should shut the fuck up.


Lets discuss the reasons, TOP 3:

1. Nothing but bullshit comes out their mouths anyway.

2. They are either talking about jibberish or something that means absolutely zero.

3. If they are running their whorish mouths, they for sure aren't blowing you.

Monday, April 28, 2008

3 May death B-day

This site is for drinking and having fun for the most part and making fun of stupid people that we hate and making a mockery of them. However, I would like to add some seriousness to pay my respects to a great man. On this day in 2004 a great man named Ronald Baum had his life taken in Iraq in Zaidon. I ask that if you are a lucky enough to be in the US that you pour one out for our dead homies. He is survived by his wife and three children. Unfortunately, I was the only person to have met this great man and ask that you pay your respects.

Mongo

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

Dude, i got a dell.

Well, after 3 weeks with out internet (new computer/ had to move so we can all be in one barracks) I am back to harrass the masses.

These weekends since the units have left have been insane. I never knew Atlantic Beach was so much goddamn fun.

First weekend- Got drunk made fun of a homosexual black man (gay negro is what i called him all night), tried to pretend that Tatanka, myself and Hereim were brothers...the Benavidos brothers. Didnt' work but was fun doing it trying to keep the stories straight while we were hammered. Also saw real life Mrs. Garrison (old dude, bald head, with white hair on the sides, wearing womens clothes....oh yeah and had a Boob Job!!!!111! WTF!!).
Damage:No blackouts, No vomits, pissed on public property in front of police.

Second weekend- Jimbo (Hereim), Krejnik and a few of Krejniks friends go back to conquer Atlantic Beach. Pregamed(6pack in 25 min) Went out met up with krejnik. Found out the competition was 4guys against 3 girls, who could get the most phone numbers. Krejnik gets the dirty award for asking a prego( pregnant chick) I asked a geriatric with a moustache for hers. Ended up taking a drunk van down to beufort to a place called Cool Fish. Contest continued, me and Krejnik's friend Nick got in with a bachloerette party. That was the decisive victory and the girls admitted defeat. At the end of the night had 2 grey goose shots, one mixture shot and the jager did me in. Vomitted at the bar and promptly left before the staff could figure out what happened. Took the drunk van back to jimbo's (by the way, the drunk van is fucking free!!)

Damage: 1 Bombit, 2 vomits, 1 blackout, 16 phone numbers that had to be deleted.

Third Weekend- Tatanka and I, head to J-ville to visit Tucka and Jiblert (tucker and gilbert). First night almost murder a turtle....That's about it, those guys are boring.
Damage: Climbed a fence with my pants down to play hockey, beers consumed...astronomical...Tatanka tried to start a fight at 11 in the morning at Waffle house... his defense we woke up drinking beers. So we were tanked.


Fourth Weekend- Is my birthday weekend...will be wearing the jersey...oh it's on.

fez

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Whats UP

Just thought i would write and let you all know that me and little k are going to be in NC in the fall hopefully we get to see you all.

Friday, April 18, 2008

Hola mofuckas

Just sayig i have been blowing up the hours with blackouts, bombitings (ultra vomits) and sheer ridiculousness with tatanka. 3 weekends in a row of nasty dirty drunkeness. If i am lucky, i just might shit my pants tonight....oh yeah, and sony sucks. My computer took a shit on me. Need to buyz a new one.

Friday, April 11, 2008

HORSEFUCKED

I got a letter today telling me i have to go to kansas city, so the lowest paid physicians in the country can tell me whether or not I'm fit to re-join the marines against my will. Yeah, I'm probably getting recalled. If that happens, forget everything you know about going big, because I will be the angriest asshole to ever put on a digital monkey suit.

Being driven to alcoholism was bad enough, now theyre trying to finish my ass off. Of course I'm fucking healthy enough to go back, have these basket weaving fucks ever taken a look at the overall welfare of the enlisted person? I've been on 5 mile hikes through Karmah where I was so god damn sick I wouldnt be allowed in a hospital. Yeah i'm fine to go do pull ups, and my ears still work well enough that i can hear a squadron gunny yelling at me. That doesnt mean I have any intention of ever experiencing that bullshit again. Fuck you, you fucking cocksuckers.

Edit: add Jolly Red to the list. anyone else getting screwed?

Thursday, April 10, 2008

New movies

I added 2 new movies to the list on the right side of the site. one of batman going apeshit, and one of amy winehouse, that was just too god damn sexy to not share. (topless)

Wednesday, April 2, 2008

Gunnamatna pwns noobs


Monarkos and Bwaaw. They go together like peas and carrots, except with no heals. Fighting scip-scaps for Gunnamatna, bragging rights, and purples. For first time Gladiators, we did pretty well, and its only going to get better. They said it couldnt be done, a Tank and a Lock in 2v2 arenas. Well guess what bitches, you just cant deal with this much going big. The shock value from seeing this combination on a team is probably enough to give us the element of surprise that doesnt normally exist in a balanced playing field. So be warned, when you see the Baconators in your queue, get ready for madness.

Monday, March 31, 2008

All or Nothing

Well we got the house today! So NightOwls now you have a home in FL to crash at!

Saturday, March 29, 2008

fucked up

hey whats goin on. ive beed drinking a little bit tonight and im going to just type whatever the fuck i want and i dont care if i fuck up the spelling cause im fucked up. word on the guitare smashing and shit.
about time purnesll got a guitar for a trophy. i mean god damn, but i guess it was time. fucking iraq. i cant belive you guys reenlisted for that but you rdid. fuck. yeah if i had the same bonus when i left i would have too. oh well i can still go big in some pissant wyoming college and teach the values of a nightowl to these stupid young bitches that have no idea what hardship is actually like. they will appreciate what they have or i'll fucking banana slap tyhe shit out of the motherfuckers.

Friday, March 28, 2008

the battle of a thousand beers

The opponents faced off, senior nightowls thought they could handle all 75 beers with ease... but they were mistaken, with P packing for advon, fez recruited the help of the most powerful drinkers on the face of the planet...Native American Ira.

The battle waged and the effects of the enemy was taking a toll on fez and ira, with 15 left, victory looked like it was within their grasp. But they were mistaken.

Snake Charmer Mudurka, thwarted the brave nightowls, he brought reinforcements of 40 more infantry bud lights and a senior officer tequila. There was no choice but to start recruiting amongst non-recognized vmu members. Kim and Hosier were soon brought into the skirmish to slow down the tide of evil alkohol.

Some of the reinforcements for the night owls were harried by more of the vile substance. Tatanka, Jibz and Joker brought their A game...and unfortunetly some wives, but that didn't stop their attacks. Along with Tatanka came an enemy only the desperate nightowl dares faces. Busch Light, 24 of the grimy mercenaries, came to help out the alkohol empire.

The alkohol empire also employed the help of elite cavalry battalion of Sam Adams. They were dispatched within seconds unlike the busch light mercenaries.

With War looking like it would be one, alkohol didn't hold back, out of the many wall lockers and fridges came their most elite warriors, guiness and baileys, soco and dr. pepper, Capt morgan (who was murdered by himself in a mexican /indian drink off).

After a grueling battle, the nightowls employed the help of Designated Driver Swope?!!? Yes Swope, he drove to mcdonalds for the nightowls to replenish.

With the enemy gone and food rations soon on the way, the guitar breaking commenced. One brutal swing, and the acoustic guitar fell victim to P. It was an all around victory.

Saturday, March 22, 2008

Sign of the Apocalypse


Jason Elam has signed with the Atlanta Falcons. The world really is going straight to hell.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

OK

Enough threats KAISER though i do understand your frustration...BUT any Nightowl currently attached to the WEEKEND STEALING VMU has not had much of a fighting chance and sitting in your room just doesn't count(No matter how much you drink..sorry Fez). I think the only remedy is some sort of renunion...which I thought my wedding could be but that won't be the case because on AUGUST 22, 2008 I will be missing FEZ, MONGO and JIB for what is set to breakthrough the bar that the TAZO's set in the epic Murrells Inlet Massacre. I announce OPEN BAR in Cape May, New Jersey on the above mentioned date which also happens to be the date we chose for the ball and chain ceremony(just kidding somehow she knows about this page!!!!). more info to come later..such as dress code, airport nonsense and accomadations etc....

Monday, March 17, 2008

Green beer and shit

Drink up, be merry. its that irish go big holiday, so do it. unless you have to fly or some shit like that tommorow. Also, I need the name of a reponsible individual who will be going to Iraq, and can act as a distribution liason for any supplies I send.

If you want any non morale related provisions, let me know that too.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Membership Request

Roman apparently wants in. we need yays and nays from the captaincy, and suggestions for a callsign. His suggestion was Greazy Rican, and wants #7.

Monday, March 3, 2008

Crackhead the dog fighter

About 30 minutes ago, a discheveled individual, who i will refer to as Crackhead, stumbled through our yard, across the street, and fell down in from of the neighbors' house. I noticed he had blood all over his arms, so took some paper towels out to him while my dad called 911. He explained that he'd been attacked by a dog while taking a sunset walk through other peoples yards, indulging in the nostalgic pasttime of fence jumping while running from the cops.

Crackhead wanted only a few cups of water, a cigarette, and the paper towels to keep coming. When the ambulance got here, they were total dicks to Crackhead. instead of treating the bites, which the blood was still flowing from, they decided to interrogate him about the dog, why he was jumping fences, and where it hurt. Just because he mentioned he may or may not have violated his probation, that doesnt put his injuries above judgement for the moment.

I salute you Crackhead, for going big enough to be on probation, break that probation, run from the cops after getting caught breaking probation, summoning your Crackhead strength to fight off a dog that was clearly a scip-scapish hater, all at the age of 48. Your example is a shining beacon to us all, and I salute your efforts.

All I ask, is that you stay the fuck away from this neighborhood from now on.
Gunnamatna.

Saturday, March 1, 2008

New Years Picture


The picture speaks for itself. Although I missed the slap of a lifetime I still dealt with a lifetimes worth of drama on this very night. I told a few people that I was gonna murder them and told a few chicks I would grab them by there hair and throw them out of my house
Captains blog, stardate 080301:
Commander worf has met a human, and decided to make her his love slave. Fez has been working double shifts, and compensated for it by turning himself into Dr. Gonzo and pissing in the corner of the console bridge. The Starship Gunnamatna hasnt done much this year as a whole, many crewmen have done jackshit, or havent been reporting anything.

Friday, February 29, 2008

game time

First off, nice blogs blaze. Fucking yagerbombs and skanks.

Just got off a 16 hour work day. And there is only one way to fix that. Get completely shit bombed and work tomorrow. I plan on being incapacitated tomorrow. By the way kaiser, one black out and about 3 hours of phone harrassment hours for the books.

oh, it's on.
and already been broughten.
mother of god.
fuck yo couch.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Gonna Stop

Gonna Stop blowing up the blog for today!

Bitches
Photobucket

Because I am bored, thats why.

So because I am bored, I figured I would share a bit of my personal collection of photos here at work. I am not sure you want to view them all, as you very well know I am a fucked up individual. So here is a link to the gallery I just posted. SOme are funny, some are just personal laugh pics, some are tits, some are not.
http://tinyurl.com/2ddcr4


no worries, I am not some internet asshole. The site is safe, but not safe for work (Your work at least)

What I do at work.........

PhotobucketFor all you bitches that wonder what my life is like now that I got the hell out the Corps here is a quick run down of my day (followed by some photos):

0715: Wake up and drink the most massive cup of coffee ever imaginable.

0745: Leave for my 30 minute hell of a bullshit drive to hell on earth.

0830: Sit at my desk and appear busy.

0845 - noon: Surf 4chan.org and other picture and chan boards. As well as youporn.com and sublimedirectory.com and m90.org while I sit and fake being busy. I might answer the phone a time or two as well.

noon-1300: Lunch

1300 - 1700: Sit and bullshit, maybe watch some porno, maybe play some internet games. I might even go sit in my car and listen to Howard Stern for 2 hours, who knows......it isn't like I really have anyone to answer to on a daily basis.

Thats my bullshit of a day. And I love every god forsaken boring as fuck moment of it. YOU KNOW WHY?

CAUSE I AM IN CHARGE OF THIS SHIT, GOT NOBODY TELLING ME MY HAIR IS OFF OR MY SHAVE SUCKS, FUCK IT, I MIGHT NOT SHAVE FOR ANOTHER WEEK, FUCK EM!

And no for some complimentary photos, I can post more if I can find the time to make [img] formats for em.





Photobucket

FUNNY_anime

Photobucket

Jesus








FUCK YOU! I'M OUT!

Monday, February 25, 2008

UR JERBS

I dont know wuddafuck everyones doing, but god damn, you trick asses need to start giving me some numbers to work with, or youre ALL FROZEN. thats right all of you. this isnt a god damn deployment right now, so i know some of you have been going big and gaining stats. send them so i can update the chart and get the awards ready before you take off.

I better receive stats on every single Nightowl, because most of them have been the same since a fucking year ago. the new ones that have been added recently especially. Jib and Joker better have some impressive numbers damn it. CRANK, SPOON AND GERBER, if you dont start posting some good fucking tales of going big, or at least make a brief fucking appearance, a vote will be set forth to demote your asses from Senior Nightowls. Blaze, i will sent you the chart so you know what to fill in. Just try to remember every drunken incident you can since you were commissioned into the Ministry. any questions, mail them to kasasm@yahoo.com.

That is fucking all.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Here she is..


In case you have never met her..this is who has to deal with me for the rest of her fuckin life

.

Hey OH!

Whats up shitbirds?

Whats this I hear about a certain fucker getting married?

What is all this re-enlistment shit?

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

Fucking TQ

Guess what assholes..... That's right I'm getting shitcanned to fucking TQ. See you assholes in April.

Saturday, February 9, 2008

Redneckery

It's that time of year again! The time nobody was waiting for, outside of the american demographic that involves drinking keystone tallboys, mullets, and tavern gunfights. The rest of us will still watch the wrecks when we accidently see them on ESPN, and live the real NASCAR past time: hoping to see a crash where somebody dies.

We can all look forward to commercials with Kid Rock gibbering something about freedom, Chevys having entire pyramids dropped into their truckbeds, and all the Toby Keith a toothless inbred growing boy needs.

Thursday, February 7, 2008

Don’t Worry We are Safe Now!!

So I logged onto my computer a bit ago and read a cover story on Yahoo about,
“Oscar-winning actress Angelina Jolie is visiting Iraq to boost what she sees as lagging efforts to deal with the problems of 2 million "very very vulnerable" internally displaced people in the war torn country.”
Is anybody else tired of this…..I mean, I guess I should feel glad that these celebrities are doing something….but No…I can’t stand them! Why can’t they stick to what they do! Lie in front of a camera! Besides them making ungodly amounts of money we now also have to see them putting themselves in a political position……Answer me this….When in the hell did celebrities begin to cross over in the political arena??
And if you are reading this Angelina..GAIN SOME FUCKING WEIGHT! So you could be hot again!

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

HI I'M CLIFF FITTIR


Hi, I'm CLIFF FITTIR. For those of you who don't know me, I'M A CLAUSIAN. That means I'm much stronger than you and....thats pretty much it. I punch robots and talk about crap nobody cares to hear. I'm accustomed to letting little kids run my life, and acting like i don't care about anything but money. So pretty much I'm Han Solo, except with the Clausian thing. If you got a problem with that, maybe you'll think twice after you see how hard i can punch my own hand. Anyways I'm posting on your blog now, so you have to put up with me.

Sunday, February 3, 2008

Best super bowl since XXXII

David and Goliath.
Manning and Brady.

God's battle. Satan loses.

Bringing back the 80’s

Okay just got done watching the latest Rambo flick, and I do have to admit I miss 80’s style action movies! From the start you see nothing but violence! No love story or bullshit betrayal….just straight up .50 cal’s, arrows, and throat ripping! Yes that’s right! Throat ripping!

Cuban B & Jolly give it thumbs up!

Friday, January 25, 2008

Dumbass goes to college

I will not be re-joining you guys in the Marines. Instead, I'll be using my GI Bill and unemployment savings on the finest of Wyoming university level education. I'll major in History, with the final goal to recieve a teaching liscense and become a history teacher in the town I grew up in. No, that town is not in Washington state, but in Wyoming. I may have been born in WA, but the most important years of my youth were spent in the 'Oming, and its time for me to return to my Mountain Pirate roots. There will be much going big, and much fraternization with 18 year old females.

Should I obtain my goal, each and every one of you will be mentioned at length to my students, including at least a week long course on how UAV's and their enlisted Pilot's changed the face of modern warfare. Mongo, Jollyred, Yogi, and the rest of the IO's will be given appropriate props for their Internal operaor skills, Fez, Vin, the great Gunnamatna, and even Wardo and Demster for rising above and Taking the External Pilot challenge to perfected heights.

Equal setting will be given for those such as the Sgt Maj. express, Wong, Irvine, and all the other shitbuckets that deserve to die in a fire. After all, the kiddies need to know what not to do, and the consequences for ones unit when these people are allowed to posess command authority.

Thursday, January 24, 2008

nah nah wtf ronald japo mcdonald?

I don't know how many of you have checked out the link to Psychlowns link to the side but it is interesting..

They say curiousity killed the cat, well in my case it took my sanity (and maybe a teaspoon of my soul) when i watched this video (psychlowns). Years of japanese anime helped me get through the first 3 minutes of this, i figured what the hell, i can make it all the way. Around minute 4 i was sucked into a vision of the apocalypse, my spirit guides were Ronald Mcdonald, Barack Obama and Paris Hilton (which is funny to me, because none of these characters have souls.).

Well needless to say, the world as we know it ended. The end.

I will add that if Barack obama gets voted in. It ends bad. Real fucking bad.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Heath Ledger

Just though I'd put this out there.
Why do so many actor/ actresses waste their time and money with drugs? You know what, fuck all these dum asses who die of drug over doses, because if I had their money you better bet I would be spending it on better thing than drugs! I hope all you famous rich druged out bastards rot in hell!

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Sorry.

Sorry Cuban-B. I will post more. Oh by the way I am engaged.

Monday, January 21, 2008

Super Bowl

Patriots or Giants.

On one hand you have the pinnacle of teamwork, a quarterback known for pulling off ice cold execution in the face of stress that would make Tom "Iceman" Kaszansky shit his flight suit, and a coach who has been renowned as a genius. On the other hand, you have a bunch of overachieving nobodies, a QB living in the shadow of his brother, and a coach who would make Heinrich Himmler Fed-Ex time out cards to New York if he had lived to see the Giants' team meetings.

I stick with my Patriots pick, but if anyone else is feeling bold, the Giants could make you some cash. One thing is for certain though, by the time the game is over I will have gone so big that my thoughts will be slurred, and the dreams I have once i pass out will be blurry.

Sunday, January 20, 2008


Go Green Bay! I would love to see GB & NE in the super bowl!

I just the saw the preview for the new Star Trek movie! And my inner geek is bouncing off the walls!

Sunday, January 13, 2008

Good start, bad end.

Seahawks, tough break kaiser.

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

Ban OH from any BCS game next year!

Damn you Ohio State, another year that you make a SEC team look great

Monday, January 7, 2008

You can't handle the Truf


This is Marcus Trufant. Most likely he will be trying to contain Donald Driver next week in cheeseland, where predictions put the temperature at 21 degrees and probable snow. For the first time since 1991 (when the seahawks went 2-14) the defense is considered the strong point of the team. Yes its true that from '91 to '01 there was no strong point, but still its a different team than usual.
With Shaun Alexander running like a Vietnam veteran with fake knees, the offense will be throwing 90% of the time once again. Normally that would be enough to bury the hawks like a pepperoni slice that has dissapeared into mike holmgren's neck, but the defense may well be able to make up for it now. I predict a close game, with the seahawks taking the lead mid-way through the 4th quarter, and then closing the packers out with a time consuming field position battle.

Sunday, January 6, 2008

Fine i will post!!! Quit yelling at me Cuban!!


Well i can't really cheat on Jennifer Aniston(since she will be my wife) So this is it. This is the woman i would give up a testicle for. But only one, and it would have to be my left. Not the biggest funbags, not the best ass. But just something about her makes me want to mount her like a stallion.
Hellz Jeah.

Saturday, January 5, 2008

Playoffs

Tommorow is the start of the playoffs. With that, I will be making a 1 nightowl assault on Issaquah, WA, with assistance from 2 others from the clan of Kaiser. I cant guarantee a seahawks win, but i can guarantee this: I will be fucked up by the end.

Friday, January 4, 2008

Numero Uno


Her name is lucy Pinder, and yes they are real.

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

Jolly's #1


I have my reasons.

List of Words Banished from the Queen's English

List of Words Banished from the Queen's English for Mis-Use, Over-Use and General Uselessness. The school in Michigan's Upper Peninsula released its 33rd list Monday, selecting from about 2,000 nominations.
"It is what it is," which Jeffrey Skrenes of St. Paul, Minn., said "accomplishes the dual feat of adding nothing to the conversation while also being phonetically and thematically redundant."
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20071231/ap_on_re_us/banned_words

---I swear this is a real article.....for those of you that were at my wedding

Dolphins are in the playoffs

next year. I bet my sweet virgin anus that miami will at least pull off a wildcard birth next year. You might think i've gone out of my skull but they werent actually as bad as their record shows. They lost six games by 3 points this year. Thats about the equivalent of being short 1 big play per game.

They will also have high draft choices in all rounds, players that are pissed about the way this season went, and Bill Parcells manning the front office. I'd add that Ricky Williams will be healthy at the start of next season, but who the hell knows if that's good or bad. Bottom Line: The Dolphins will make the playofs next year. I guaran-fucking-tee it.